Facing Discouragement Head On

This past year was full of health challenges and after a couple of surgeries, I thought I was headed for a new year of better health, but things haven't gone the way I expected.

Over the past month, I've struggled with even more issues, visited several doctors, and still have no answers. Friday I went to the doctor again and found out I need another endoscopy. (I've already had 4 done in the past.) When I heard the news I became very discouraged wondering if I was ever going to feel good again. 

That afternoon, I spent most of the day crying and praying asking God for help. I felt so helpless and alone. I didn't want to burden my friends or family with my problems. I've always tried to be the positive one, the one with rose colored glasses. And to make matters worse I haven't been sleeping. Why am I sharing all this very personal information? Because I need prayer. I'm human. I'm weak. 

We didn't go to church today because of my health issues. Instead, we watched an old sermon by Pastor Adrian Rogers. The sermon was on discouragement and boy, what a timely message! 

Adrian gave Biblical reasons why we face discouragement which included fatigue, frustration, fear, and failure. As I listened, it was like he was speaking directly to me. I'd faced all those recently and they'd really weighed me down. 

Thankfully, he also reminded me, as I listened, how to pinpoint causes of these feelings and how to combat them. The keys, he said, were to renew your strength by remembering God's constant closeness, to remember how He's protected and provided for you in the past, and to keep your eyes fixed on the Lord. 

Before the sermon ended, he shared a poem (author unknown) that gave me a little kick in the rear- 

"I want to let go, but I won’t let go. There are battles to fight, By day and night, For God and the right— And I’ll never let go.

I want to let go, but I won’t let go. I’m sick, tis true, Worried and blue, And worn through and through, But I won’t let go.

I want to let go, but I won’t let go. I will never yield! What! Lie down on the field and surrender my shield? No, I’ll never let go!

I want to let go, but I won’t let go. May this be my song: “Mid legions of wrong— Oh, God, keep me strong That I may never let go!”

I know there are many fighting their own battles today, and like me, discouragement may have wrapped its fist tightly around you. If you're struggling, please don't give up. Heed the words from Adrian's sermon and the poem I've shared. More importantly remember these Scripture verses: 

"I can do ALL things through Christ to strengthens me." Philippians 4:13

"For God has NOT given us a spirit of fear but of power and of love and of a sound mind." 2 Timothy 1:7 

"But thanks be to God, who in Christ ALWAYS leads us in triumph (as trophies of Christ's victory ) and through us spreads and makes evident the fragrance of the knowledge of God everywhere." 2 Corinthians 2:14 

Please pray for me in the days ahead:

1. That the test will be scheduled this week and the problem will be discovered. 

2. Pray for my gastroenterologist, Dr. Woods,  to have wisdom to know best how to help me. 

4. Pray the tests don't reveal a cancer recurrence. 

5. Pray for me to have the ability to combat discouragement with faith. 

Thank you so much.

Adversity makes us stronger

I read somewhere that we must partake of the bitter with the sweet. There's a divine purpose in the adversities we encounter every day. They prepare, they purge, they purify, and they also bless. When you look at life that way, it's a little easier to accept trials as they come.

Today I spent the first few hours of the morning in the hospital having some tests done. Apparently, I have polyps growing in my stomach. The doctor wanted to do an EGD, a test where they take a lighted hose with a camera and a cutting tool on the end of it and run it through your mouth down into your upper intestines. I've had it done once before when doctors were looking at a hiatal hernia in my belly so I knew what to expect. It's weird to be conscious one minute and totally out the next. When the anesthesiologist told me they were going to give me Propofol, I immediately thought of Michael Jackson for some reason. No sooner than I'd begun that thought, the room went dark. The next thing I knew, a nurse was fiddling around with some paper in my room and I was wondering how long I'd been there. Scary.

My husband came in a few minutes later and then the doctor. Dr. R explained that I had some erosion in my esophagus lining, a large hiatal hernia, about 20 or more polyps in my stomach and a few more things I can't remember. He told me he'd biopsied all of the suspicious areas and I'd get the results in a week to ten days. I'm not worried at all, which is really strange. I have a wonderful peace about everything and I know that's the result of many prayers going up for me.

When it was time to leave, a beautiful black nurse came to wheel me out. She had the sweetest smile and I told her so. I could tell by her sweet spirit that she was a believer and I told her I could see Jesus sticking out all over her. She laughed and thanked me. She said she needed to hear that and said she was indeed a believer. I told her how blessed we are to have a mighty Savior and she agreed. It was so nice to share a little of our faith with each other. God always plants special people in my path and as I listen to the Holy Spirit's prompting, I know which ones to share a word of encouragement with and when.

We left the hospital and my hubby asked if I was hungry. I hadn't been able to eat anything before the tests and although I wasn't really hungry, I knew he was so I said, "Sure." We ran by a fast food restaurant and grabbed a couple of biscuits and headed on home.

I'm feeling remarkably well today and I have a lot to accomplish including reading some of my new book, "Never Fear Cancer Again." Although cancer is always in the back of my mind, I'm trying not to let it come to the forefront again. I'm continuing to do everything I can to stay healthy and strong. So far, so good! If adversity truly makes us stronger, then I must be a power lifter.  I've certainly had my share of trials and tribulations, in fact, enough to last a lifetime but I'm sure God doesn't have the same view I do. I know He has used my trials to teach me some very valuable lessons over the years and I wouldn't take a million dollars for any of those lessons. I am thankful for tough lessons but I'd rather have easy ones. Don't we all feel that way?

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