Journey Out of Pink

I've always been a person who liked to move forward, even when the path was difficult. As an avid hiker, I'd rarely waste time researching trails even though trail guides provided a lot of information regarding difficulty levels. If I'd given a little time to studying those maps, I could've saved myself a lot of trouble. Sometimes a trail ended up being more strenuous than I expected and my aging knees balked. Other times, I'd find myself on a very unfamiliar trail, only to have to back track when I got off course. Nowadays, many hikers use portable GPS devices to pinpoint their location. I can barely follow Google maps and heaven forbid if I find myself in a dead zone. I can get lost really fast.  Navigating isn't my strong suit, but since I like to hike, I do. Even though I don't use a GPS, I do try to be cautious and protect myself from injury. I wear sturdy shoes. I take along extra water, rain gear, and a few snacks. I also notify family where I'm h

Yesterday we had a new dishwasher installed. The man who came to do it was fast and efficient. We did our best to make him feel welcome in our home, talking to him about various and sundry things as he worked, but we could tell he was uncomfortable. He wore a mask and gloves - of course we knew it was due to Covid concerns, but it seemed so unnecessary.  When he finished his work, we thanked him and I offered a gift of gratitude. Though he accepted my gift, he made sure my hand never touched his gloved one. When I stuck out my hand in thanks, he thrust his elbow at me. "Oh," I said, "I get it. Covid. Okay." With that, I gave him the acceptable elbow bump and he was on his way.  I felt like a leper.  I don't do well with rejection. It's been a thing since childhood. Rejection hurts, no matter how large or small it may be.  Thinking about the worker's fear of contracting a disease from us made me feel sorry for him. I understood it and respected it, but wi

This morning I was scheduled for a barium swallow study at the hospital. Thankfully, hubs took off work and went with me.  The test was different from the last one I'd had done way back in the 70s. I was so glad! I didn't have to swallow that nasty, chalky barium liquid like I did when they were testing me for gallbladder issues then. Nope, the stuff they gave me today was fairly pleasant.  They started off having me swallow a light barium liquid. I had to hold it in my mouth until they said swallow and as the liquid was going down, they filmed it. Next, we progressed to a thicker mixture. After several images, they gave me a spoonful of what looked like marshmallow creme. I called it Fluffy Whip and the technician laughed. After I'd gotten that down and the video had been filmed, I was given a graham cracker with more Fluffy Whip on top. It took a few minutes to chew and swallow. As they filmed that one, the girl asked me if it was difficult to swallow and I had to shake m

With the recent supply chain problems, people all over the world are finding themselves in precarious situations when things they need and rely on are unavailable. A recent trip to the grocery store opened my eyes in a big way. Many of the shelves were empty and the ones that did hold product were sparse. News reports and social media outlets have been reporting on supply chain issues for months. I hadn’t really given them much thought until I was an eyewitness. As I wandered through the store, picking up essential items, I wondered what would happen if one day in the near future, we weren’t able to have access to necessary medications? I wondered what would happen if I couldn’t get my blood pressure medication? Would it spike rapidly causing an emergency room visit for intervention? And what about my thyroid medication? What would happen if I couldn’t get that? I don’t have a thyroid gland and need the hormone to make my body function properly. Thinking about those two possibiliti

I'll be telling my age when I mention a really cool song by the Zombies - Time of the Season, but I thought it appropriate as I write this post about Father's Day.  In 1967, the song came out and I fell in love with the melody and the lyrics. The chorus would get stuck in my head and live there for days. See if you remember it - What's your name? (What's your name?) Who's your daddy? (Who's your daddy?) (He rich) Is he rich like me? Has he taken (Has he taken) Any time (Any time) (To show) To show you what you need to live? (Tell it to me slowly) Tell you what (I really want to know) It's the time of the season for loving You can watch/listen to it on YouTube if you aren't familiar with it:  https://youtu.be/T8ecsAI3FhY Anyway, I always wondered about those who had no idea who their Daddy might be. I'm thankful I know who mine was and boy, do I miss him.  My Daddy was a character. It's hard to believe he's been gone for 11 years now. He was a

This weekend, my daughter emailed a copy of a newspaper article to me. She knows I like to keep up with all things cancer related and would definitely be interested in this miraculous news.  As I opened the email and began reading, my jaw dropped. I could barely believe my eyes.  The email contained an article about a  small clinical trial involving   a dozen rectal cancer patients.  The trial participants  were given a monoclonal antibody,   D ostarlimab,   every three weeks for a period of six months.   ( This drug  is  sold under the name , Jemperli, by Glax oSmithKline  and   has been  approved  by the Food and Drug Administration  for use in treating some  types of  endometrial cancer. ) During the trial, diagnostic  test s were   performed  on each patient and the results were almost impossible to believe-  the  rectal cancers were gone!   This was remarkable news and  oncologist, Luis Diaz, Jr., MD, with Memorial Sloan Kettering,  said:  “I believe this is the first time this ha

  I read a quote today that really hit home:  "You will either step forward into growth, or you will step backward into safety." — Abraham Maslow As I read the quotation, I felt it prick my soul. How very true those words were for my life. I'd always been a person who needed safety and security. I'd always found comfort and solace in the known. The unknown, however, always tempted me with curiosity and a hint of danger, but more often than not, I opted for stability and routine. My type A personality enjoyed the control of knowing what lay ahead.  For the past 7 years, I did freelance writing for a cancer publication. It was a huge blessing in so many ways. It provided an outlet for me to discuss all aspects of my cancer journey and gave me a huge perk of getting paid for sharing those experiences. When the 7th year rolled around, I felt I'd said all I had to say about the subject. I was tired of cancer and found myself dreading coming up with articles for the mag

Lush berries ripe on the vine  Today was a gorgeous sunny day! After church, we decided to visit a local farm that was open for a few hours. They were offering to let folks pick berries - strawberries, blackberries, and blueberries. Since I'd already visited at the end of May for strawberries, we decided today would be a blueberry picking day.  My husband and I checked in at the farm's checkout stand, picked up our buckets and headed into the fields to pick berries. We had arrived right when they opened so there were only a handful of people there and none of them were interested in the blueberries. It was nice to have the blueberry fields all to ourselves.  We picked and picked for about an hour. The sun was getting hot, and we were so thankful we'd thought to bring our hats and sunglasses.  A young mother and her little boy joined us for berry picking and we enjoyed listening to the little boy get so excited over every berry he found. Each time he'd spot a berry, he&#

  Almost 8 years ago, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. Since that time, I've learned more about the disease than I ever cared to know. Part of that knowledge came from my own research and part of it came from actual experience. Either way, I wish I'd never become acquainted personally with the disease.  Cancer has brought both good and bad things into my life. The bad definitely outweigh the goods on the scale of justice, I'd have to say, but instead of focusing on the negative, today I'll focus on the positive.  Cancer has given me new opportunities to meet people I'd never have met otherwise. I've met people through online breast cancer support groups, through classes at the cancer treatment center, and through other activities offered solely for cancer survivors. Although it's seemed like a secret sorority at times, it certainly isn't close to one of those. Though I've never belonged to a sorority, I've watched enough movies to know what th

  The day started early. I woke at 6 a.m. and tiptoed into the kitchen to have my devotional. My sweet husband had taken the day off work so he could accompany me to the hospital for the test. I didn't want to disturb him. He'd set his alarm for 7 a.m. and that extra hour of sleep would be good for him.  The kitchen was dark when I entered. The red light from my head lamp made things take on an eery glow. Pulling out my devotional book and my Bible, I sat down at the table and began to read.  The time went by quickly and before I knew it, I heard hubby's alarm going off and a few minutes later, the shower running. While he got ready, I went back in the room to make the bed and get dressed myself. We needed to leave the house as close to 8 a.m. as possible so we could arrive at the hospital in time to find a parking space, get registered, and pay our co-pay.  As I busied myself with small details, I tried to keep my thoughts in check. Of course, I was worried, but I did my b