The Crack in the Crock that Made Me Cry

 

It was such a small thing—or so it seemed.

I had recently bought a beautiful Pioneer Woman crockpot, a cheerful shade of turquoise blue that brought a much-needed pop of color to my gray-and-white kitchen. It felt like a small indulgence, a bit of joy sitting right there on my countertop. I’d only used it a couple of times when I noticed a large crack running along the bottom of the ceramic insert.

At first, I tried to convince myself it was only superficial. Surely it couldn’t be serious. But as I washed the pot, my fingers traced the line again—and again—and I realized the crack was deep. Deep enough to make it unsafe. Deep enough to mean the crockpot was destined for the trash.

I stood there at the sink, holding that broken piece, and felt tears rise unexpectedly in my eyes.

It surprised me. After all, it was just a crockpot. Yes, it had been fairly expensive. Yes, it was brand new. But my reaction felt outsized for the loss. And that’s when I realized: this wasn’t really about the crockpot at all.

That crack had touched something much deeper.

Lately, my life has felt cracked in places too. We’re facing another move—one I hadn’t planned on making at this stage of life. While my heart understands the wisdom of being closer to one of our children as we age, my spirit resists the upheaval. The realtor is coming this week. Conversations about listing the house, timelines, and next steps are looming. And then there’s the packing… again. The letting go. The learning my way around a new city. Making new friends. Finding a new church. Starting over.

It feels like too much.

I don’t like change. I never have. And when change stacks up, one small disappointment—like a cracked crockpot—can be the thing that finally opens the floodgates.

That day at the sink, God gently showed me something important: sometimes our tears aren’t about what’s in our hands, but about what’s in our hearts. The crack didn’t cause the pain—it revealed it.

Scripture reminds us, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit” (Psalm 34:18). Not just in the big heartbreaks, but in the quiet moments when we feel overwhelmed, fragile, and worn thin.

Maybe the crack was an invitation—to pause, to acknowledge my fear, to admit my resistance, and to bring all of it honestly before God. Maybe it was a reminder that even when life feels fractured, He is still steady. Still present. Still holding me.

I don’t know what lies ahead. I don’t know how I’ll adjust or how long it will take for a new place to feel like home. But I do know this: God meets us in the cracks. He understands our tears—even the ones that surprise us. And He is patient with hearts that are learning, once again, how to trust Him through change.

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Lord,
You see the cracks I try to hide—the weariness, the fear of change, the grief over things I didn’t expect to lose. You know how easily I become overwhelmed, and how small moments can carry great weight. Help me to release my grip on what was and trust You with what is ahead. When change feels too heavy, remind me that You go before me and walk beside me. Give me peace in the uncertainty, courage for the transition, and grace for myself along the way. Thank You for caring even about my tears over broken things. I place my heart, cracked places and all, into Your loving hands.
Amen.

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Stay Sharp!

Pencils or pens? It all depends. If I want temporary, I'll use a pencil. If I'd rather have permanent, I'll use ink. Both writing utensils are wonderful to me because they allow me to express my thoughts anywhere, anytime. Of course, I love computers, too, but there's just something about writing out things by hand. 

This morning, I was jotting down my to do list. I usually do that in pencil because I'll often want to add to or change something - you know, it's a woman's prerogative to change her mind....right? And I do it all the time. But there's one thing that irks me - a dull pencil. I can't stand writing with an unsatisfactory nib. 

Normally, I'll use a lead pencil. They're efficient and stay sharp for longer periods of time depending on the lead quality, put those old Ticonderoga pencils need to be sharpened often and I get tired of pulling out my little battery operated sharpener to tighten up the point. 

Remember those big, fat black pencils we had in elementary school? You know, the ones without erasers? I hated those. I wanted the ability to erase when I wanted to and I didn't like having to use those rectangular pink erasers we used to have. I still have one of those callouses on my middle finger from writing all these years, although it's not as prominent now as it was then. 

Then, we graduated to the thinner number 2 pencils - the yellow ones with the pink erasers attached to the top. I loved those, but again, would get irritated when the point got dull. Thankfully, our teachers allowed us to use those hand crank sharpeners affixed to the classroom wall as long as we raised our hands and asked permission first. They were fun to use. Turning that little knob round and round gave me pleasure but if I wasn't paying much attention, I'd sharpen too much and the point would break causing me to start all over again. 

Sharpness. Why do I find it so important with pencils and not so much with life? As I've grown older, my thinker doesn't work as well as it once did. It'd be nice to be able to slip it into a machine and grind it to a fine point and why is it that I can remember things 50 or 60 years back with such ease but not so much yesterday???

Iron sharpens iron, the Bible says so. I know it to be true because when my kitchen knives get dull, I pull out a sharpening steel and give the knives a few passes over it and then they're good as new. But what does the Bible mean when it says, "Iron sharpens iron?" Well, the entire verse is found the book of Proverbs 27, verse 17: “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” That means as believers, we can help sharpen each other by holding each other accountable, helping each other in times of need by offering love and encouragement, or reminding each other of important Biblical truths when one of us strays. 

Just like a pencil, we can get dull in our walk at times, that's why it's so important to fellowship with other believers - it's kind of like we're human sharpeners for each other. 

None of us are able to "stay on point" all the time without a little assistance. We're human. We stray. We don't always remember to lean into God. When we're weak in our faith or in our walk, we need to "rub up against" another believer who may be able to help sharpen us again. 

Strange analogy, you may be thinking, but I believe we're like pencils in a lot of ways. We work pretty well for a time and then we begin to lose our edge. That's when we need a sharp blade to shave us into readiness again. 

These days we need to be sharp all the time, especially over the next few weeks, so pay attention! If your nib is dull, talk to another believer, ask for prayer. Let them point you to Biblical truths to help get you back on track. And for heaven's sake, don't forget it's okay to forgive yourself for mistakes now and then. Just like the pencil has an eraser, God allows us to mess up. And then we can ask for His help to get up, and He cleans it up allowing us to begin again! He never keeps records of our wrongs - remember, the Bible say, in Psalm 103, "For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.” But we have to be willing to ask. We can't scrub the paper as hard as we can with our eraser and rub out the screw up, it will just tear a hole in the paper! Only God can take our errors and correct them forever. 

Everyday Devotionals Bonnie Annis

The Second Day of the New Year

The second day of a new year has a quiet weight to it. The excitement of midnight has settled, the calendars are still mostly blank, and here we are, waking up to a day whose details we don’t yet know. There’s something both unsettling and sacred about that. We step into the morning not knowing what conversations we’ll have, what news we’ll receive, or what unexpected turns might come our way. And when we zoom out beyond today and think about the entire year ahead, that feeling deepens. We can plan, prepare, and pencil things neatly into our calendars, but the truth remains: we don’t really know how it’s all going to unfold.

Scripture reminds us that this uncertainty isn’t something to fear, it’s something to surrender. “The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps” (Proverbs 16:9). We do our part by being faithful with what’s in front of us, but God is the One who sees the whole picture. Even when the path ahead feels unclear, we can rest in the promise that He is already there. The unknown doesn’t catch Him off guard, and the details we can’t foresee are held securely in His hands.

That’s where trust becomes more than a concept, it becomes a daily choice. Choosing to trust God means believing that, no matter how the year unfolds, He will work within it for our good. “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him” (Romans 8:28). As we step into this new year, may we loosen our grip on outcomes and strengthen our grip on faith, confident that the One who walks with us today will faithfully carry us through every tomorrow.

Lord, thank You for the gift of a new year and for this day set before me. I confess that I don’t know what lies ahead, but I choose to trust You with every unknown. Help me to walk by faith, not fear, and to rest in the assurance that You are working all things together for good. Guide my steps, calm my heart, and remind me daily that You are in control. Amen.

Everyday devotionals ©️ Bonnie Annis

A New Year!

This morning I was thinking about the home I grew up in. It was an old cinderblock home, nothing fancy, in fact it was an architect's final build in order to get his license. 

Inside that house, on the second story, inside the bottom cabinet of the bathroom, was a laundry chute. Those weren't too popular in the late 50s and early 60s, but we had one. 

My brother, sister, and I thought it was great. Though it was built for convenience, we used it for sending toys and other things down into the laundry area of our garage. 

I can still remember standing over the top of the chute, hands ready to let some precious cargo speed down the chute while yelling "Bombs away!" And I can still see the wide eyes of my sibling peering up through the chute at me, waiting to retrieve the payload. 

Those days were filled with childhood fun. We made good use of that laundry chute, but so did Mama. It made her life easier not to have to carry loads of clothing down our long flight of stairs. 

As I was thinking about that laundry chute today and our cries of "Bombs away," I thought, that's a good motto for this New Year. Instead of holding onto the past events that have traumatized us, we need, in our hearts, to be willing to let go with a proverbial “Bombs away.”

We also need to be willing to expect God to provide all we need for the New Year. 

While the Israelites were wandering through the desert for forty years, they didn't have much in the way of food. They got tired of their typical diet and begged God for something different. God heard their cries and answered, providing them with a new breakfast food called Manna. 

The manna appeared every morning. The Israelites were given specific instructions on gathering it and they were not to store it up for the following day. If they disobeyed and gathered some manna to save for the next day, it would spoil before they could eat it. 

This year, perhaps we need to wake each day looking for our manna - God's perfect provision for whatever the day holds. 

As we look for it, I hope you can envision a "heavenly laundry chute" with God at the top and yourself at the bottom eagerly looking up to see what He's going to send your way. 

I doubt seriously that you'll hear God yell, "Bombs away," like we did as children, but I imagine, if you could see His face, you'd see a huge, loving, kind smile and eager, heavenly hands ready to bless you. 

Last year was a terrible, awful, very bad year in many ways, but, if you think back, I'm sure there was some manna tucked in there, too. 

This first day of 2026, Look up! The Lord is your Provider! He is Jehovah Jireh. Let Him take care of all your worries, all your cares, all your needs. He wants to bless you. And if you keep your gaze locked on His beautiful face, nothing else that touches your life will matter because He has the manna. And He's going to make sure you have just enough for each and every day. 

© Bonnie Annis

You can read more about Manna in the Bible in Exodus 16.

The New Year and My Uncompleted Bucket List

The new year always has a way of sneaking up on me, like a cat on a screen porch—quiet, determined, and suddenly right at your feet. As I step into this next year at 68, firmly planted in the sunset season of life, I’m more aware than ever that time is no longer something I assume I have in abundance. The years don’t just pass anymore; they sprint. And yet, even with the calendar pages flipping faster, my heart is still full of hopes, dreams, and a bucket list that’s been tagging along with me since my teenage years.

I started that bucket list back when my knees were original equipment and didn’t come with screws, hinges, or weather-related complaints. Over the years, I’ve been blessed to cross off quite a few things—some planned, some unexpected, and some that only God could’ve arranged. Still, there are a handful of dreams that refuse to loosen their grip on me. Ireland and Scotland call my name every time I hear a fiddle tune. Alaska still feels like unfinished business, even though I've been there once. I want to return again, only this time, I don't want to see the inside of their cardiac care unit! And Israel, well, that place has a way of settling into your soul and demanding a return visit, too. As for completing the Appalachian Trail, I’ll admit that dream and my mechanical knee have been in ongoing negotiations. I guess I'll remain a section hiker for life. 

These days, my knee predicts rain better than the evening news, and I don’t bounce back from long walks the way I once did. I’ve learned that ibuprofen is a food group and that stretching is no longer optional; it’s survival. Still, I’m Southern enough to believe that where there’s a will, there’s a way… even if that way involves frequent rest stops, good shoes, and someone else carrying the heavy stuff. I may not hike mountains the same way I used to, but I can still chase wonder, beauty, and meaning wherever God places them.

What I’m learning, as this new year approaches, is that dreams don’t have an expiration date. They may need adjusting, slowing down, or reimagining, but they’re still worth holding onto. Maybe I won’t check every box on that old bucket list, but I can still live fully, laugh loudly, love deeply, travel wisely, and savor the goodness in each borrowed day. If the Lord gives me the strength, I’ll keep moving forward, one careful step, one hopeful prayer, and one slightly creaky knee at a time. After all, as we say down South, I may be getting older, but I’m not done yet.

Losing a Friend is Never Easy

Today a sweet friend of mine went home to be with the Lord. My heart is saddened by his passing, but I know his worn and weary body is completely healed now. 

C.G. was 97 years old and had been married to his highschool sweetheart, Earlene, for 70 years! Please keep her in your prayers. 

Both C.G. and Earlene loved their family and friends deeply, but loved the Lord most of all. 

They were simple people who enjoyed gardening and serving their community. They also were huge fans of the Georgia Gym Dogs and loved taking others to their meets. 

Many tears have fallen today because of a deep loss, but God has collected every one and stored them in His bottle. 

I take comfort knowing I'll see C.G. again one day. I'm so thankful he loved Jesus. 

The Weight We Often Need

I found this on the Internet and it resounded with my soul so I thought I'd share. I'm unsure of the author's name, but hope it will speak to you-

I used to think burdens were like a hiking pack you didn’t realize was getting heavier. You start the trail feeling good. Confident. Maybe even a little overconfident. The straps are adjusted. The view is nice. You’re thinking, This isn’t so bad.

And then a mile in, your shoulders are on fire.

You stop and check the pack like maybe someone slipped a rock in there when you weren’t looking. You didn’t agree to carry this much. You didn’t pack it intentionally. But somehow the farther you go, the more weight you feel. Every step costs more than the last.

That’s how burdens show up.

Not as some dramatic collapse. Just a steady increase in weight. A season that starts manageable and slowly becomes exhausting. A responsibility, a grief, a situation you didn’t plan for that quietly changes how you move through everything.

We tend to treat burdens like proof something has gone wrong. Like if we were doing faith correctly, the pack would stay light. Like God hands out smooth trails to the people doing it right and uphill climbs to the ones who missed something along the way.

But Scripture keeps saying things that ruin that theory.

“Come to Me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”

Not come to Me once you’ve lightened the load. Not after you figure out why you’re tired. Just come. With the pack still on. With the straps digging in.

Which makes me wonder if burdens aren’t obstacles at all.

What if they’re bridges.

And I don’t love that idea. Because I would prefer a shortcut. Or a chair. Or for someone to meet me on the trail and say, actually, you don’t have to carry that anymore.

But here’s the uncomfortable truth. I don’t draw closer to God when the trail is easy. I do when I’m tired. I pray differently when I’m out of strength. I listen more closely when my own plans clearly aren’t enough.

Desperate prayers aren’t polished. They don’t sound impressive. They sound like, I can’t do this by myself. And somehow, those are the moments He feels closest.

Jesus didn’t say He would remove every heavy thing. He said, “Take My yoke upon you.” Which means He steps into the weight with us. Close enough to carry it together. Close enough that the load shifts.

And maybe that’s the part we miss.

The burden didn’t mean God stepped away. It meant He stepped closer.

Grief teaches you how to pray without pretending. Hard seasons strip away the illusion that you were meant to carry everything alone. The weight you never asked for becomes the place you finally stop performing and start leaning.

Bridges don’t feel safe when you’re standing on them. They sway. They creak. You can see exactly how far the drop is. But they exist for one reason. To get you somewhere you couldn’t reach on your own.

So if you’re carrying something heavy right now, maybe the question isn’t, "How do I get rid of this?"

Maybe it’s, "Where is this taking me?"

Because sometimes the very thing that brought you to your knees is the thing that brings you closer to the heart of God. And one day you realize you weren’t abandoned under the weight.

You were being carried across.

The Most Precious Book

This year, we’re not home to do our traditional Christmas morning but normally I pull out our old family Bible for devotional time. 

That Bible is falling apart. It’s held together with layers of tape so I keep it in my Grandmother’s cedar chest for safekeeping. 

I remember Mama telling me they bought it back in 1962 from a traveling salesman. They made $5 a month payments til it was paid off. 

It’s permanent place was atop an old antique mahogany library table in our living room, always opened to Luke chapter 2 during the Christmas season. Inside, a red velvet ribbon marker held the place. Over time, it’s disintegrated, but I hold tightly to the bits and pieces still hidden in my heart. 

Today, during our Christmas in the mountains, I can almost feel Mama and Daddy here.

I hope you have a special family tradition or memory that brings you joy today. Many blessings- Bonnie

Silent Night Before Christmas

I sit on the deck of a beautiful cabin tucked deep in the mountains of North Carolina, watching the sun slowly slip behind the trees. Below me, leaves rustle as deer skitter through the underbrush, unseen but unmistakably present. There’s a coolness in the air now—just enough to remind me that night is on its way and that tomorrow will be Christmas Day.

This isn’t what I expected when we made our reservations. In my mind, Christmas in the mountains meant snow-dusted branches and frosted mornings, a white Christmas straight out of a postcard. Instead, the air is almost warm, brushing 70 degrees, and the forest wears shades of brown and evergreen rather than white.

And yet.

The stillness settles in a way snow never could. No rushing. No noise. Just the quiet companionship of creation breathing around me. It slows my thoughts and gently shifts my focus from what I imagined to what is. I’m reminded that some of the best gifts arrive unwrapped and unplanned.

God is so good to gift us this beauty—this pause, this peace. “Be still, and know that I am God” (Psalm 46:10) rises gently in my heart, as if the mountains themselves are whispering it back to me. Gratitude swells until it feels almost too big to hold.

Christmas, I realize, is more than a single day circled on the calendar. It’s a heart song—one that plays quietly when we stop long enough to listen. It lives in sunsets instead of snowfall, in rustling leaves instead of carols, and in the sacred stillness that reminds us Emmanuel is still very much with us.

Lord, thank You for meeting me here—in the quiet, in the unexpected, in the beauty I didn’t plan for but needed all the same. Thank You for the rustle of leaves, the soft fading light, and the stillness that settles my heart. Help me to carry this peace with me beyond this moment, beyond this season, and into the days ahead. Remind me that Christmas is not confined to one day, but lives wherever gratitude dwells and love takes root. May my heart remain open, still, and listening.

Amen.

Everyday Devotionals ©️ Bonnie Annis

Chew on This!

On this blessed eve before Christmas, my prayer is that you will take time to ponder. Ponder isn't a word we use a lot in today's world, but it's the perfect word to convey the effort of digging deep, gleaning treasure, and mulling it over and over again. And if you've no idea where to start in this task of pondering, I'd like to give you some food for thought with the help of one of my favorite authors, Madeleine L'Engle . 

As you read the quotation below, please don't read it only once. To really ponder it, you need to...let me give you a good analogy here...you need to be like a cow. A cow takes in its food, chews it, digests it, and then the food moves down into one of the cows multiple stomachs. A little while later, the food is brought up again to be chewed on a little more, for a little longer, and then digested again. That process is exactly the essence of pondering. And this thought deserves to be considered in that way -

"Was there a moment, known only to God, when all the stars held their breath, when the galaxies paused in their dance for a fraction of a second, and the Word, who had called it all into being, went with all his love into the womb of a young girl, and the universe started to breathe again, and the ancient harmonies resumed their song, and the angels clapped their hands for joy?"

A Blue Christmas in the Mountains

This morning I stood at the cabin window, coffee in hand, staring out at a world stripped down to its essentials. The trees are bare now, their branches etched against an overcast sky like quiet pencil drawings. Beyond them stretches a long range of mountains, layered in soft shades of blue—the kind of blue that doesn’t feel cold so much as thoughtful. The kind that invites you to pause.

Winter has settled in up here. Not the dramatic, snow-globe kind—just a calm, gray stillness that feels like the earth holding its breath. Christmas is only two days away, and the mountains seem to know it. Everything feels hushed, as if creation itself is waiting for something holy… or at least for cookies to come out of the oven.

Looking at all that blue, I can’t help but hear Elvis crooning in my head: “I’ll have a blue Christmas without you…” It fits the view perfectly. And if I’m honest, it fits my heart a little too. Christmas has a way of shining a bright light on who’s missing from the room. I miss the noise of a full house, the overlapping conversations, the laughter coming from three directions at once. I miss the chaos—because love often looks like chaos when everyone you love is together.

But this is where gratitude gently taps me on the shoulder.

While not everyone can be here this year, we won’t be alone. Our youngest daughter and her husband are coming up to celebrate Christmas with us, and they always arrive carrying more than suitcases. They bring joy, laughter, and a happy energy that fills every corner of the cabin. The kind that makes even a quiet mountain Christmas feel festive—and somehow louder than expected (especially once games start or someone burns something in the kitchen).

They have a way of reminding me that joy doesn’t have to be big to be real. Sometimes it shows up in shared meals, late-night talks, and laughter echoing off cabin walls. Sometimes it looks like two young people walking through the door, instantly warming the whole place just by being themselves.

So yes, it may be a blue Christmas—blue skies muted by gray, blue mountains fading into the distance, blue notes humming softly in my heart. But blue doesn’t always mean sad. Sometimes it means deep. Sometimes it means reflective. And sometimes it’s just the color of a beautiful mountain morning that reminds you how blessed you still are.

From this cabin window, with leafless trees and layered blues stretching as far as I can see, I’m choosing gratitude. And maybe humming a little Elvis, too—just not too loud. The mountains deserve their quiet.